the children are out to get us

07Aug12

This just in: sex is the leading cause of pregnancy throughout the US. Research is still being collected for the remaining nations, but scientists are confident that the results will remain consistent throughout the continents.

As we begin to look at the upcoming epidemic facing the nation, it is essential that we take this new research into consideration.

In order to best protect ourselves from the children of tomorrow, we need to be more intentional in how we create them. If not, the children will eat our rapidly decreasing food supply (thanks to the increase of global warming that seems to be wiping out plants root by root). According to a confidential report by the RAND Corporation, the two spectrums of diaper wears (the babies and the aging boomers), will soon create a crisis where current tax revenue is inadequate to support the education and maintenance of this new generation. Basic survival for anyone born after 2020 is a high concern.

And if that wasn’t enough, more alarming doomsday scenarios skeetch a future of civil war, where those now cute poopy-diaper wearers will soon become teenagers who will create a civil war in which they arm themselves with robotic tanks and remotely operated aerial drones to attack an elite group of greying elders.

The only solution is to solve the problem of sex resulting in babies.

This is a project assigned by BBDO’s Matt Herrmann during my summer Creative Thinking & Problem Solving Class at the Academy of Art University. To date, we are not really at risk of a future civil war and over population. With that being said, sex is still the leading cause of pregnancy, and all the other facts presented are…well…facts.

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